Dating a bisexual man
As such I highly recommend telling your wife BEFORE you act on your desires.As long as you haven’t broken the trust, there is really nothing for her to take issue with: you haven’t done anything – yet.In the end it is much like jumping off a cliff into a cold lake: you just have to leap; no amount of planning and preparation will prevent that initial shock. Once the toothpaste is out of the tube, there’s no getting it back in.The most important thing to consider about telling your wife you are bisexual – or anyone else – is that you understand clearly that once those words pass over your lips they can never be put back. What does this mean for you when considering if you should tell your wife you are bisexual?This was the experience of both my wife and I after telling her.She was angry that I’d lied, but she was also touched that I’d told her.However I also knew that my admission may have meant I was living this gloriously authentic life on my own in a little one bedroom apartment downtown, with her having taken the two kids and everything else, except my self-definition as a bisexual man. Many of the married men who tell their wives they are bisexual are pleasantly surprised by the support they receive from their spouses.
The biggest issue my wife had about my confession of being a bisexual man was that I’d lied to her: I’d gone with guys behind her back.
In these cases there may come a point after you tell your wife that you’re bisexual – but before you’ve done anything – where you are no longer willing to wait for some kind of clear direction or conclusion to your dilemma, if this should pose one.
In this case you may be required to act on your desire regardless of your wife’s comfort with it.
Telling her before engaging in sexual activity allows both of you to work through the meaning of your newly-found sexual orientation.
You can discuss how you’re feeling; what you’d like to do; the confusion you’ve been grappling with; your need to act on your desire, to explore, etc.